The Party Before the Party

This past weekend I was scheduled to host a bridal shower for my daughter’s best friend, Kathleen. Now, mind you, this was a very low-key event with just a handful of women (mostly family) who were scheduled to come for a cocktail hour type situation. My daughter and Kathleen have been neighborhood besties since the beginning of time. She is like another daughter to me. Kathleen has been around our home enough to know we have lots of welcoming love with varying amounts of jumbledness on any given day. My goal was for Kathleen to feel the support and love from her old neighborhood family whose also known and loved her since the beginning of time. 

At the same time, my son was visiting from Columbus with his two little children. The plan was for most members of my family (except me) to meet at the soccer field where other grandchildren were playing so I could have some time to organize things for Kathleen’s party. Shortly after everyone departed for the game, I had the house to myself. I set out to clean up the Hot Wheel cars and puzzle pieces from the floor, organize the space and set out fancy glassware for fancy bubbly. Just as I was feeling a new sense of order, the thunder began. Literally. Shortly thereafter, there was an onslaught of familiar cars entering the cul-de-sac and onto our driveway. Within moments, I had a stream of grandchildren and their parents burst into the kitchen. 

 “Nona,” I heard with enthusiastic energy. “Our games were cancelled so we thought we’d stop by.” 

Oh great, I thought. However, I still had plenty of time to make my hummus platter and arrange some fresh flowers. So, in they came out of the rain and into round two of chaos. I don’t know about your grandchildren, but mine are perpetually hungry. So out came every possible type of snack I had which then morphed into lunch which meant the newly vacuumed floors needed another go-around. Truth be told, I loved this impromptu “come as you are” cousin crew gathering that popped up. Also, I love when my adult children are together. Their shared sibling bond makes me happy. Everything was as it should be except for the fact that another party unrelated to this family invasion was due to begin in just a few hours.  

Thanks to some last-minute delegation, the party was again on track. No time for me to do flowers, so my daughter-in-law showed up with flower arrangements that set a perfect backdrop. A helpful text from my niece offering to come early allowed me to change out of my comfy Nona slippers into more entertaining-worthy shoes. 

When Kathleen arrived accompanied by my daughter, we were ready. Our happiness was unleashed and we enveloped her with love and celebration. Honestly, it didn’t matter that there were a few remnant Hot Wheel cars under the couch. Our celebration for the bride-to-be was perfect. We gifted her with something old, new, borrowed and blue so she could know we would be with her in spirit at her destination wedding. Tears of joy between the spaces of our tenured mutual love flowed. I’m still smiling remembering it all.

For me. the sacred pact of grandparenthood is when a grandchild shows up at your door. Even when unannounced, and even before you’re about to host a party, you simply open your arms with joy. I also realize the desire to visit Nona after a rained-out soccer game will wane with time. So at least for now, when there’s a spontaneous party with Hot Wheel cars before the real party with flowers and champagne, it’s all ok with me.